Family

Mel's family:

Mom - "Cindy" passed away in 1994.
Linda - big sister
Cindy - big sister
Raymond - Twin brother
Big Mike - cousin
Dan - husband
George - Linda's husband
Roger - Cindy's husband
Christina - Raymond's wife
Michael - Linda and George's son
Andy - Linda and George's son
Kimberly - Cindy and Roger's daughter
Matthew - Cindy and Roger's son
Nicky - Cindy and Roger's son
Samantha - Christina and Ray's daughter
Ryan - Christina and Ray's son

Mel valued his family more than anything. Our house is filled with photographs of everyone. He was always there if someone needed him to watch the kids or help with a problem. Uncle Mel was loved by his nephews and nieces. I became uncle Dan. Mel gave me two great gifts, his love and his family.

When Mel's mom was dying with cancer in December of 94, Mel did all he could to help her and the family. It was a very difficult time for Mel as he was hospitalized with pneumonia and began treatments for CMV retinitis, a sight-threatening disease. Even as he struggled with that he made himself available to his mom to help care for her. Mel's love for his mom was incredible. He missed her terribly when she passed. He had his name and birthdate engraved in her headstone as his wish was to be buried next to her when his time came.

Mel loved everyone in his family, and they all loved him. Its too bad that his dad is such a jerk. He missed out on having a good loving relationship with his son. And Mel missed out on having a good loving relationship with his dad. I sometimes get angry about it, but its best to just let it go.

Mel had a chance to visit my family in Rockport, MA twice. They all liked him and he liked them. The long distance kept us from spending more time with them. It would have been nice if they could have gotten to know Mel better.

I got a kick out of the fact that both Mel and I were twins. Mel had Ray and I had Jeff. Mel and I were as gay as can be, and Ray and Jeff are as straight as can be. Jeff really came through for me when Mel died. He flew in from Yellowstone Park and helped me get through the initial shock and grief. It meant a lot to me to have someone from the Hogan family at Mel's service. Birthdays for Ray will never be the same. The first without Mel may be the hardest, but we'll be there for you Ray.

More Family ... next time

Well, a lot has happened to the family. In the spring of '99 Roger, Cindy, Big Mike, Matt, Kim, and Nick all moved to Tracey. They have a nice place with a pool. Michael got married. Ray has a new job. The kids are all growing up.

Updated February 10, 2000.